So one of the things Brandon and I have had to do to prepare for our upcoming nuptials is premarital counseling. It's something that's required by the Episcopalian church, which is probably a good thing because it's been really beneficial but I don't think we would have done it otherwise.
While we've always been pretty open and honest with each other about future plans and expectations, counseling has provided us with an opportunity to address things we'd never thought much about. For instance, every couple needs to have a healthy fighting style. Some couples hide their emotions under the surface, never fighting with each other at all, while all of the anger and hurt builds like soda in a bottle. Then, when they eventually explode, they assume the relationship is over. Scary!
Brandon and I have never been like that, but counseling has provided us with great ways to communicate through disagreements rather than trying to argue semantics, fight just to win the argument rather than resolve an issue, or to perpetuate our own points of view without listening to the other person.
Our awesome counselor, Reverend Andrew, also asked one important task of us throughout our counseling: He wanted us to read a book on marriage together. He made the point that most people do more research before they buy a car than before they enter into a marriage, because we are raised to believe we all have some sort of innate ability to know how marriages are "supposed" to work. Not necessarily so. Brandon and I spent some time on Amazon.com and picked out this book (The 10 Conversations You Must Have Before Getting Married), which (admittedly) we need to pick up the pace on, but has been a great conversation starter so far. Excellent!
I highly recommend that anyone in a long-term relationship that is headed for marriage try premarital counseling. Even if you don't NEED it, it certainly won't hurt! And hey, you never know what you'll learn about yourself or your fiance.
TTFN!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Bad at Keeping Up
Alexis here! I'm terrible at keeping up with this thing.
Still maintaining my laissez-faire attitude about wedding planning, which has been both good and bad. I think things will turn out nicely, but there is still a lot left to do and not a whole lot of time to do it!
Our guest list keeps expanding, despite all our efforts not to let that happen. It's okay - it will still be a small shindig, and though our budget has not grown with the guest list, that just means smaller pieces of cake for each person. Or something like that. :)
So, here's what's worked out:
WEDDING AND RECEPTION LOCATION: Church of the Redeemer, Washington, GA
OFFICIANT: Rev. (Dr.) Denni Moss
DATE: August 1st, 2009
TIME: 3:30 PM
REHEARSAL DATE: July 31st, 2009
REHEARSAL TIME: Afternoon/early evening TBD
MAID OF HONOR: Hayley Colvard
BRIDESMAID: Katie Jones
BEST MAN: Evan Rhodes
GROOSMAN: Colin Rhodes
FLOWER GIRL: Millie Burke Stoller
PIANIST (Wedding March): Troy Colvard
PIANIST (All other music): A lady at the church I have not met/spoken with yet. Need to get on that!
PREMARITAL COUNSELOR: Rev. Andrew Mullins (2 sessions down, 1 to go!)
PASSAGES TO BE READ (from The Book of Common Prayer): Song of Solomon 2:10-13 and 8:6-7; Corinthians 3:12-17; John 15:9-12.
SAVE THE DATES: Sent!
INVITATIONS: Bought; Brandon is doing calligraphy
PHOTOGRAPHER: Miguel Pajares
DRESS, SHOES, VEIL: Ready!
TUXEDO: Brandon has one, but he is unhappy with the cut so he may buy or rent another one.
CAKE: Hayley Colvard
CATERING: Bones of Washington, GA (more details TBD)
ALCOHOL: TBD
FLOWERS: We're only doing bouquets for my girls and me, which we're going to get at a local store on the day of the wedding.
DECORATIONS: None bought just yet - Katie, Brandon, and I will be making a trip to find some the next time we hit Atlanta!
MUSIC: iPod playlist, buddy! Need to rent speakers.
HONEYMOON: Savannah, GA (details TBD)
...PHEW! There is a lot left to do, but all of the important parts are locked in place. We have a place to be married, the people we love coming, someone to marry us, and someone to capture the memories. Everything else is small potatoes! As long as we are married at the end of the day, it will have been successful.
More to come soon. Well, sooner than 6 months, like last time.
Still maintaining my laissez-faire attitude about wedding planning, which has been both good and bad. I think things will turn out nicely, but there is still a lot left to do and not a whole lot of time to do it!
Our guest list keeps expanding, despite all our efforts not to let that happen. It's okay - it will still be a small shindig, and though our budget has not grown with the guest list, that just means smaller pieces of cake for each person. Or something like that. :)
So, here's what's worked out:
WEDDING AND RECEPTION LOCATION: Church of the Redeemer, Washington, GA
OFFICIANT: Rev. (Dr.) Denni Moss
DATE: August 1st, 2009
TIME: 3:30 PM
REHEARSAL DATE: July 31st, 2009
REHEARSAL TIME: Afternoon/early evening TBD
MAID OF HONOR: Hayley Colvard
BRIDESMAID: Katie Jones
BEST MAN: Evan Rhodes
GROOSMAN: Colin Rhodes
FLOWER GIRL: Millie Burke Stoller
PIANIST (Wedding March): Troy Colvard
PIANIST (All other music): A lady at the church I have not met/spoken with yet. Need to get on that!
PREMARITAL COUNSELOR: Rev. Andrew Mullins (2 sessions down, 1 to go!)
PASSAGES TO BE READ (from The Book of Common Prayer): Song of Solomon 2:10-13 and 8:6-7; Corinthians 3:12-17; John 15:9-12.
SAVE THE DATES: Sent!
INVITATIONS: Bought; Brandon is doing calligraphy
PHOTOGRAPHER: Miguel Pajares
DRESS, SHOES, VEIL: Ready!
TUXEDO: Brandon has one, but he is unhappy with the cut so he may buy or rent another one.
CAKE: Hayley Colvard
CATERING: Bones of Washington, GA (more details TBD)
ALCOHOL: TBD
FLOWERS: We're only doing bouquets for my girls and me, which we're going to get at a local store on the day of the wedding.
DECORATIONS: None bought just yet - Katie, Brandon, and I will be making a trip to find some the next time we hit Atlanta!
MUSIC: iPod playlist, buddy! Need to rent speakers.
HONEYMOON: Savannah, GA (details TBD)
...PHEW! There is a lot left to do, but all of the important parts are locked in place. We have a place to be married, the people we love coming, someone to marry us, and someone to capture the memories. Everything else is small potatoes! As long as we are married at the end of the day, it will have been successful.
More to come soon. Well, sooner than 6 months, like last time.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
We have a location!
My mother rocks. She's been great in helping to get things going, making calls to various churches in Washington to get rates and information.
We decided to be wed at the local Episcopalian church, Church of the Mediator, by a lovely lady named Rev. (Dr.) Denni Moss. It's a small church, and they're happy to let us do a rehearsal the night before, have Troy play the Wedding March on their piano, use one of their halls for the reception, and serve beer and wine. It doesn't seem like a stuffy, religiously conservative church, which was important. It's perfect for us!
By random chance last night, Brandon and I found ourselves watching "My Best Friend's Wedding" on television, throughout which Brandon made snide comments. However, we both ended up identifying with Cameron Diaz's character when she said (I'm paraphrasing), "I've been all over the world. I want to be with my husband on our honeymoon, and I don't care where that is. That's what makes it a honeymoon!" This led us to conclude that Savannah, GA - a place we've been before and loved, has an easygoing air, access to a beach, delicious food, and is far-removed from hustle and bustle - would be a great choice for our honeymoon. It's no Cabo or Paris, but it's us.
In keeping with the simplicity of everything, we've decided to start a Honeymoon Fund on (hold onto your hats, as this name is brain-explodingly adorable) Honeyfund.com. You can check it out here. We are planning to drive down to Savannah for four nights and five days and stay at our favorite bed and breakfast. It will just be nice to recouperate after all of the festivities. We both felt that we have everything we need to live a normal married life, given that we've been living in sin for about four years already. We wanted to make the registry simple for us, easy for our guests, and fun.
In other news, Hayley has officially agreed to be my Maid of Honor and (drumroll, please) OUR CAKE BAKER! She is an amazing baker but is very nervous about the process. I keep saying that as long as Brandon and I are married at the end of the day, that's what's important. If the cake melts or falls over or isn't flawless, nobody is going to cry. We want Hayley to be creative and have fun with it - and we SO, SO appreciate her willingness to take on such a huge task in addition to her Maid of Honor title. She's the best sister in the world.
Wish us luck as we continue the process into the next layer of all the small details that into planning a big celebration. Will write again soon!
We decided to be wed at the local Episcopalian church, Church of the Mediator, by a lovely lady named Rev. (Dr.) Denni Moss. It's a small church, and they're happy to let us do a rehearsal the night before, have Troy play the Wedding March on their piano, use one of their halls for the reception, and serve beer and wine. It doesn't seem like a stuffy, religiously conservative church, which was important. It's perfect for us!
By random chance last night, Brandon and I found ourselves watching "My Best Friend's Wedding" on television, throughout which Brandon made snide comments. However, we both ended up identifying with Cameron Diaz's character when she said (I'm paraphrasing), "I've been all over the world. I want to be with my husband on our honeymoon, and I don't care where that is. That's what makes it a honeymoon!" This led us to conclude that Savannah, GA - a place we've been before and loved, has an easygoing air, access to a beach, delicious food, and is far-removed from hustle and bustle - would be a great choice for our honeymoon. It's no Cabo or Paris, but it's us.
In keeping with the simplicity of everything, we've decided to start a Honeymoon Fund on (hold onto your hats, as this name is brain-explodingly adorable) Honeyfund.com. You can check it out here. We are planning to drive down to Savannah for four nights and five days and stay at our favorite bed and breakfast. It will just be nice to recouperate after all of the festivities. We both felt that we have everything we need to live a normal married life, given that we've been living in sin for about four years already. We wanted to make the registry simple for us, easy for our guests, and fun.
In other news, Hayley has officially agreed to be my Maid of Honor and (drumroll, please) OUR CAKE BAKER! She is an amazing baker but is very nervous about the process. I keep saying that as long as Brandon and I are married at the end of the day, that's what's important. If the cake melts or falls over or isn't flawless, nobody is going to cry. We want Hayley to be creative and have fun with it - and we SO, SO appreciate her willingness to take on such a huge task in addition to her Maid of Honor title. She's the best sister in the world.
Wish us luck as we continue the process into the next layer of all the small details that into planning a big celebration. Will write again soon!
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
A Week After the Engagement...
I have made the solemn promise, both inwardly and out loud to many people, that I will not become a Bridezilla. For one thing, Brandon and I don't have the budget to support any diva-like behavior from me. For another, nobody likes a rotten bride.
Nevertheless, given my let's-get-this-going nature, I have started full-force planning our wedding. That's right: and we got engaged last week. I just can't stand the idea of leaving things to the last minute, so I'd rather get as much out of the way now as I possibly can. Plus, if you're early in the process and generally relaxed about the outcome, it can be pretty fun.
The deets so far are as follows:
Planning on an August 1st, 2009 wedding.
It will be held in Washington, GA.
We're planning to have the ceremony (and possibly the reception) in one of the non-Baptist churches in town.
Maid of Honor: Hayley Colvard (who has yet to be asked whether she will accept this honor, but being my sister, she may have no choice)
Bridesmaid: Katie Jones
Hoping to have bro Troy Colvard play the piano/organ/whatever, if he's willing. I've been thinking a Kenny G-like sax solo may be in order, but Troy may disagree.
Wedding colors: Burgundy and Light Yellow
Fair warning: This will be a very casual affair. Those expecting a country club wedding filled with champagne fountains and ice sculptures will be disappointed. We are barbecue-eating, liquor-and-beer-drinking, craft-making, Wal-Mart-shopping folks. No, I won't be duct-taping the dress, but neither of us have any intention of making this wedding the bane of anyone's existence. This is meant to be a fun celebration of our love and commitment, and that's how we hope to keep it!
Brandon and I chose our wedding colors over the weekend, when Katie came to visit. She's been an amazing help, and a huge reason we've started the planning process so soon. Katie lives in the A-T-L most of the time, and we'll be planning everything from New York. Katie and my mom have been instrumental in giving ideas and offering help wherever needed.
Naturally, since my best friend was visiting and probably won't be back up here until May, we had to go dress shopping. And let's be frank: that's the most fun of this whole process, minus, perhaps, the cocktail and cake tasting. While Brandon was at work, Katie and I headed to David's Bridal today to test the waters... and we left with the perfect dress! I know, I know. I'm hasty. But it's beautiful! I'll leave the design to the imagination, but I think it's wonderful.
More details to follow in the coming months. While it's unreasonable to think that this wedding won't bring its share of stress, it's Brandon's and my goal to make it as simple a process as can be hoped for. Wish us luck!
Nevertheless, given my let's-get-this-going nature, I have started full-force planning our wedding. That's right: and we got engaged last week. I just can't stand the idea of leaving things to the last minute, so I'd rather get as much out of the way now as I possibly can. Plus, if you're early in the process and generally relaxed about the outcome, it can be pretty fun.
The deets so far are as follows:
Planning on an August 1st, 2009 wedding.
It will be held in Washington, GA.
We're planning to have the ceremony (and possibly the reception) in one of the non-Baptist churches in town.
Maid of Honor: Hayley Colvard (who has yet to be asked whether she will accept this honor, but being my sister, she may have no choice)
Bridesmaid: Katie Jones
Hoping to have bro Troy Colvard play the piano/organ/whatever, if he's willing. I've been thinking a Kenny G-like sax solo may be in order, but Troy may disagree.
Wedding colors: Burgundy and Light Yellow
Fair warning: This will be a very casual affair. Those expecting a country club wedding filled with champagne fountains and ice sculptures will be disappointed. We are barbecue-eating, liquor-and-beer-drinking, craft-making, Wal-Mart-shopping folks. No, I won't be duct-taping the dress, but neither of us have any intention of making this wedding the bane of anyone's existence. This is meant to be a fun celebration of our love and commitment, and that's how we hope to keep it!
Brandon and I chose our wedding colors over the weekend, when Katie came to visit. She's been an amazing help, and a huge reason we've started the planning process so soon. Katie lives in the A-T-L most of the time, and we'll be planning everything from New York. Katie and my mom have been instrumental in giving ideas and offering help wherever needed.
Naturally, since my best friend was visiting and probably won't be back up here until May, we had to go dress shopping. And let's be frank: that's the most fun of this whole process, minus, perhaps, the cocktail and cake tasting. While Brandon was at work, Katie and I headed to David's Bridal today to test the waters... and we left with the perfect dress! I know, I know. I'm hasty. But it's beautiful! I'll leave the design to the imagination, but I think it's wonderful.
More details to follow in the coming months. While it's unreasonable to think that this wedding won't bring its share of stress, it's Brandon's and my goal to make it as simple a process as can be hoped for. Wish us luck!
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